So....I most definitely prefer to watch my drama on TV rather than actively participate in it. It's just not my thing. I absolutely adore drama series though. Be it, Real Housewives, Love & Hip Hop or The Haves and Have Nots, I get my "drama fix" from any one of these all the same. I was reading a recent article featuring Morris Chestnut(*pause for fineness....and digressing*) where he was asked for his perspective on 2 popular dramatic characters currently on TV and how they participate in extramarital affairs. His response, that I totally agree with made me think. He stated "First of all....it's entertainment.." Great response, Morris! It's so easy to be engulfed into our favorite shows and their characters that sometimes we may fail to remember that it's meant to be for "entertainment purposes only"
Week after week, we follow these characters as they act our their fantasies and desires without any inhibitions. We may even live our life vicariously through them. However this is not what I thought about when reading Mr. Chestnut's response. I thought about or questioned, "Hmmm, I wonder how many times I have been meant exclusively "for entertainment purposes" in someone's life unknowingly?" In my 38 years of living, I've encountered many different people. From some of these encounters, great, meaningful, and irreplaceable relationships and friendships have been formed. The latter part of this is that some have not. I've endured heartache and pain and have had to search unsuccessfully for the meaning behind it all. I have come to realize that some were meant to show me what I do not want out of a relationship or friendship and others shown me a reflection of my own relationship immaturity.
Yep, I'm not ashamed to admit that I alone was the mere cause of the downfall of some potentially fantastic relationships. However if I can allow myself to be even more transparent, I have to stand in the middle of my truth(thank you, Sister Iyanla for that term) and realize that no matter what I did, sometimes I was never meant to be anything other than "entertainment" for some. There was never any solid evidence of being anything else but that(and nope, I am not referring to sex, lol). Sure, I had friends that I could hang out with, male and female, and we could go out and have a great time together. That has never been a problem for me. My motto is to "Have a good time in whatever you do or it ain't worth doing!" However, when there came a time that I needed a friend to talk to or just be there, some were unreachable or dare I say even inadvertently questioning "Why are you calling me?".
So how do you keep from being offended by this? Good question, I haven't found the answer to that one yet. I do know that it has caused me to look inward at myself and at my encounters with people to whom I consider to be my friends and them likewise. I try to live persistently by the precept, "Do unto others as you would have them to do unto you." I never want to portray to someone that you are just for mere entertainment purposes, just to make me feel good about myself, make me laugh when I'm sad or keep me entertained when I'm bored. We have a whole vast world filled with inanimate objects to do that for us. People are meant to bring a meaning to our lives, be it good or bad. Sometimes, you can find yourself surrounded by people who are extremely negative or it appears that nothing positive comes out of anything they do. The meaning of these relationships should be self-reflection. What is it in you that is attracting these kinds of individuals and furthermore what's in you to tolerate this negative behavior and think it's ok? I've had to do it on several occasions and once I did, I had to be even more stronger and determined to be able to walk away from those persons and situations.
Merriam-Websters dictionary's definition of entertainment is "amusement or pleasure that comes from watching a performer, playing a game, etc." Do we really need to use people we consider to be our friends to do that? Sure, it's wonderful to have friends that make you laugh or to have a good time with, but after the laughs and the good time is over, what are you ultimately bringing or pouring into your friend's life and vice versa? Don't make your friendships or relationships fuel for your entertainment. Trust me, we have so many other avenues and other forms of entertainment for that. How about you join me on Thursday nights for one of my most favorite ones.....SCANDAL!! I promise you it will be "entertaining" to say the least, LOL....